A Whale Blasted an Ungodly Amount of Ass Ham All Over Some Divers
A group of divers near the Caribbean island of Dominica were engulfed in a mighty cloud of shit churned out by a sperm whale. The men were on a routine expedition to photograph the whales when one of their subjects started blasting an ungodly amount of butt butter into the ocean while spinning in circles, causing what one of the divers called a “poonado.” Showing no mercy, the beast didn’t stop until a 100-foot-wide cloud of its Mississippi mud had coated the divers and their equipment.
In a show of unwavering dedication to his craft, Canadian photographer Keri Wilk managed to capture the experience on film. Some believe the torrent of rusty nuggets was a little known defense mechanism, triggered by the proximity of the divers. On the o… Continue Reading (5 minute read)
So cool, whale poop actually acts as ocean fertiliser, and it’s what keeps the oceans healthy.
It’s red because whales feed at immense depths on iron-rich organisms but are unable to digest sufficiently because of the pressure. They’re only able to poop at the surface, where their crazy iron-y faeces causes plankton feeding frenzies and blooms that keep krill populations healthy, and therefore anchors the food chain for every other organism in the water column – including themselves.
[Every sperm whale draws 50 tons of iron to the surface every year. ](https://www.npr.org/sections/krulwich/2014/04/03/298778615/the-power-of-poop-a-whale-story)
They truly are the gardeners of the ocean.
Should’ve gone with turdnado.
Or whirlpoop.
[The largest brain on earth belongs to the sperm whale](https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/news-blog/are-whales-smarter-than-we-are), so it was probably laughing its ass off when it did that drive-by.
At least they didn’t get spermed by a Poop Whale.
for me to poop on
Can you even smell while scuba diving?
Ah yes, the peerless majesty of the sea. How humbling and wondrous!
The hippo pooper of the seas.
Did anyone notice the URL.
Who calls poop *ass ham*?